Turned away by mental health staff

*TW Self-harm and suicide* A few months after my diagnosis, I had some episodes of suicidal thoughts. I was very scared and I needed help. My GP told me that the only support he could give, was for me to travel to A&E and wait to be seen by someone. I didn't want to go to A&E. I felt that A&E was a scary place of flashing lights and injuries. But I was desperate, and if I didn't go, the GP would most likely call emergency services to take me, so I went. When I got there I waited and waited. I was then taken to a room not much larger than a cleaning cupboard. There were no windows. There were two members of mental health staff, nurses I think. Three chairs took up most of the room. Outside th

The moment I got my diagnosis

After an hour and a half of questions, the psychiatrist told me that I met the criteria for Borderline Personality Disorder. 'It's better if this doesn't go in your notes,' she said, referring to my NHS medical records. It's information for you, she told me, something for you to know. It doesn't need to be on official record. Being told this by a consultant psychiatrist communicated to me loud and clear that my diagnosis was something to be hidden. Something not to be shared, even with other medical professionals. It made me feel ashamed. Maybe she was attempting giving me freedom from a hugely stigmatised diagnosis. But being told that my diagnosis shouldn't be on my notes filled me with fe

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​© Talking About BPD

Rosie Cappuccino 2020

Please note that this site is not a substitute for professional medical/mental health advice.

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